"Para sa mga taong inlove…indi inlove at maiinlove… LOL!!!…"
WARNING: Not suitable for people under the influence of lovelessness... Cupid's guidance is suggested...
Before I said 'goodbye workie & hello weekend' today, Flor (my team's WF scheduler & Ka-telebabad sa work) sent me this 'cheeeesy' email ("love cheetos" I would say) that capped my week. I was laughing and literally pulling my hair off because of how artlessly funny these phrases were structured.
See for yourself.
Pampataba ng Puso...
Remembering Papa...
As my family is going fast forward to go to Papa's place at Kalasungay... I'm pausing a bit to post this memorial note that I published in Facebook last Father's Day (June 21, 2009)... Sharing it again to everyone... 
MY ROCK...
From the moment we lost Papa to a massive heart attack last May 14, 2009 to the time we sent him to his resting place six days after, his 69 waking years photo-played to us in full color and grandeur. The stories and anecdotes shared by mama, his siblings and relatives, his close friends, and even his apos made me appreciate more how Papa journeyed the world as an upright son, a loyal friend, a persevering brother, a doting lolo, a faithful husband and a hardworking provider.The way he lived his life came home through the outpour of caring messages, prayers, flowers and faces who paid their last respects. The generosity of relatives and friends were far more perplexing.
Two days prior the burial, I told one of my bestfriends that Papa’s passing was very arresting to me, because in loosing him his hard headed youngest found his real self.
His passing made me recollect the life rule that he edified for me to go by –“to make every day count.” His and Mama’s modest parenting armed with that rule continue to lead me to a world of beautiful stress, miracles and incredible friends whose definition of care is yet to be uttered. Really, at the end of Papa’s life, the job that he had, the home that he proudly built, and the farm that he painstakingly tilled were eluded by what I and my sibs have become because of him.
Despite the countless good things mentioned during his wake and the things that I’m starting to parley, you might think that Papa’s perfect. No he’s not and I never dreamt of him to be. I grew up seeing him to some extent detached and yes his smile is very costly, that you need to push hardwork in school to the next level to get that worthy grin on his face.
As his kids started to pursue their lives and his youngest with his conquests... their merits no longer satisfy him as before, yet his face became brighter. Why? This is because his crowning glories are increasing in numbers and are growing up (needless to say... more hard headed than I am)... his apos. His wistful glees are more manifested during Sundays and holidays, especially when he’s surrounded by his noisy and messy apos. This time the more noisy and messy his home becomes the more smiling he is. Sundays and holidays will never be the same again, we’ll miss his smile, notably his beautiful idea of peace at home around the clatter and clutter of his apos.
The 100-meter march from St. Ignatius Chapel to Papa’s tomb last May 21st was by far the longest walk that I took, yet the most humbling experience not only because of the throngs of people who accompanied us to bury him but the realization that life’s hard, but my hardships are nothing against the hardships that my father went through in order to get me to where I started. Humbled that he didn’t tell me how to live; he lived and let me watch him do it. What is more... he watched me lived my life with a very accepting heart.
“Pa, I can’t thank you enough… for loving us unconditionally... love you more..."
My Love Affair with Iterax®
The financial gains of working in an outsourcing industry have all its perks but the major drawback is the way it warps your sleeping segundos. With the ten-hour shear stress in managing a team, and the responsibility of opening my line 24/7, how and where the freakin’ crackpot will I place to get a healthy space for me to get my Zzzzs. On a normal workday after logging out I would normally rush towards the available cab parked outside our building, superbly excited to put my back on my bed and go to dreamland. But wait, after resigning to my silo for the day I have troubles in even getting a wink. It would take me five to six hours to doze off.
Yes!!! I have challenges in initiating and maintaining sleep for years now. I’ve counted several flocks of sheep plus pictured perfect meadows with Victor, Jake and Enchong as my shepherds (yes that’s Basa, Cuenca and Dee) but to no avail. I’ve tried several sleeping tabs and sleeping aides, but they can’t just run through my nerves. For a walking toxin like me, the pharmacology of these pills is not working for me. Inside my system they don’t work the way they were made for. I tried a sleep aide cocktail once and vowed never to do it again (teehee!). Sleeping is really that difficult for me.
Until I met, the glorious Iterax®, it was one of my colleagues who advised me to try it months ago. Actually, Iterax® (Hydroxyzine diHCl) is an Anxiolytic/Antihistamine/Antiallergy drug and one of its side-effects is drowsiness. For more, Iterax has proven to be of value in relieving temporary anxiety (Yipeeee!!). After a very short courtship, I fell in-love with this pill because the affair-effects were phenomenal. Unlike Vs your body will not ask for more, 10mg’s and you’re off to dreamland. Did I say that - you can get it over the counter and it’s very cheap? Yes you can get it for less than 20 pesoses… I guess the big bonus for me is it helps manage anxiety.
For what it’s worth this drug chemically worked for me and I love our romantic affair for now!!!
Image from ehow.com
My Fujiwhara
“Two tropical storms colliding,” that’s how they define Fujiwhara. The word became so common lately after Typhoon Parma (“Ondoy”) interacted with category 5 super Typhoon Melor (“Pepeng), impacting the movement of the latter making its second landfall at Northern Luzon.
Oooops! I’m not a weatherman (Am I swishing already?) or planning to take a position at Philly’s weather bureau… Then why the hell I’m chattering this phenomenon? This is because Pinkjadedknight is undergoing his own fujiwhara of sorts… just cooking some metaphors dahlin! (Teehee!)
Pinkjadedknight is in the middle of two conflicting storms… decisions colliding and ambiguities rotating around one another as if they are figure skaters doing acrobats inside his head. One misstep and they will end up crashing on solid ice. These blips in his “meteorological” radar have been disturbing his atmosphere for quite sometime now. Wrecking havoc to his sanity, so to speak. Pointing to his self-assurance absentia, the kind of fear that this freakin’ faggot has in terms of where he’ll pick himself up once he starts regretting whatever he decides upon. For an egoistic prick like him failure is as deadly as a category 5 tropical storm.
Why can he not assure himself that like the nature of a fujiwhara that when two tropical storms they don’t blow up to one perfect storm?
Why can’t he just be spontaneous?
Why can’t he just…
Image from http://weblogs.sun-sentinel.com
Happy Singles Day
One of my direct reports – Dhon, came walking and stomping at my spine early today, greeting everyone “HAPPY SINGLES DAY!” In which I retorted (with smugness!), “IS THERE REALLY A THING?” Yes… there he was all smiles… days after he wrote an open letter to his Once-Pooh (now already enjoying someone’s carrot instead of his honey). Well it’s commendable to say the least that he’s taking everything lightly (for someone who’s never been cynical when this elusive L, that you all call LOVE, which I call LOCO), or is he really happy or just painting a façade? Hmmm…
Well… Single? (me panting!) Ask me? Dang’it! I’ve been single since time immemorial and I constantly prowl every time this becomes a dessert discussion or a cohol topic. My team (the group who loves heckling my heart) would always tell me that it’s my fault why I’m still unattached. They can give you a hundred and one reasons why their “cynic” boss is still single. My resignation always is I’m busy, I’m married to my job, I have priorities… and all the brouhaha!... Hmmm… it’s a choice!
To be frank and honest, my heart sits inside a fortress. An impenetrable and impermeable stronghold, assembled from bricks of fear and delusions. Yes! I’m terrified that my heart will be broken into pieces if I go ahead and commit, also I have this false impression that in taking the pink road you would never find a perfect love. I’m proud that I’m free and single but as months pass the freedom no longer interests me. My life’s no longer hearty, hence the word. DAMN ME!!!
How will I fix this? How will I put this heart back into working order? Can you smell desperation? LOL! To be candid about it… I don’t want to be left-on-the-shelf… Neither you, right?
Image from http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3132/2631198382_5b34e833f7.jpg
Yasmin Ahmad : Storyteller
Yasmin Ahmad (July 1, 1958 - July 25, 2009) was a critically-acclaimed multi-award winning film director, writer and scriptwriter from Malaysia and was also the executive creative director at Leo Burnett Kuala Lumpur. Her television commercials and films are well-known in Malaysia for their humour, heart and love that crosses cross-cultural barriers, in particular her ads for Petronas, the national oil and gas company. Her works have won multiple awards both within Malaysia and internationally. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yasmin_Ahmad
Clips below are by far two of her outstanding works that I've seen:
IMPERFECTLY BEAUTIFUL
RICH SON, POOR SON
These two ad-clips blew my feet hitting my very core. Even the hardest of the hard will be knocked over with the humanity of its message!
REM Horrible Animations
A cold creaking sound is the only thing audible on a very stoic and pin-drop silent afternoon, as we opened my friend’s casket. His dead human form now lays in full view to his family and friends who’ll dearly miss him. He was wearing a well tailored tux and his cheeks look so alive that he seemed he’s just dozing off. Good make up," I said to myself. "I still couldn’t believe that he’s dead, and I was given the honor to carry him to his grave. As one of his closests, I am one of his pallbearers, which is by the way a first for me.
As I was looking at my friend's dead body, I begun to reminisce the time we met, recollecting our crazy moments, his vanity & sanity, his laughter, the very time when he pulled me up when I was at my worst… tears begun to swell in my eyes and I started to hyperventilate… And there!Spoof! I woke up from that morbidity… with my heart throbbing very fast; my system sucking all the oxygen it needs; and my thoughts perplexed for the meaning of that dream, my system went in suspended animation for the reason that it was the 3rd eerie dream that I have for the night… Yes THE THIRD… and by far the creepiest. The friend that appeared dead in my REMs is very much alive.
So I decided not to go back to sleep. Who would? Who knows where the dream fairy will take me the 4th time. I turned my lappie on, and went online. After updating my Facebook status to – “... Woke up from a series of ghoulish dreams!!!.” I opened Google and frantically typed “dream meaning” on its search box and whooolah according to http://www.dreammoods.com/ -
“To dream that you are burying a living person, signifies emotional turmoil. Alternatively, it suggests that you are being buried by problems and stresses of your waking life."
Stress? Yes I have my daily dose of it everyday. Overdose to say the least. But by far, the past seven days was one of the most dreadful waking weeks of my entire life. I was under a lot of failures, horrors and in-between frustrations. To add, painful because I just kept it inside my silo. For seven days I was stuck on a crossroad of a life-changing decision. No decisions made as of yet but I’m very grateful for being blessed with a very loving family, encouraging friends and a very loyal team who are very supportive to what I will be deciding on. They are the very reason as to why my sanity is still intact as of now, and continually fills my glass of optimism with MLs of hopes that the sun will still shine on me tomorrow.
image from www.mindcafe.org/
"Today I Will Be Master Of My Emotions"
To this day I still wallow over my loss, that I get teary eyed everytime I think of my Pop. Indeed grief is a journey, and there are no shortcuts to this travel as much as I want to. Along every step that I make everyday though, people, experience and things will tend to teach you something to make the journey bearable.
As I was manning our SupeRewards (A sales incentive intended to top performers of my team) Big Redemption Day I got this ‘lightbulb-moment’ chance to read Og Mandino’s philosophy in life, love and everything in-between... printed on a calendar posted on one of my direct report’s station. I basically ripped it off and brought it to my station. Then I begun reading… The calendar contains Og Mandino’s “The Scrolls” – as per Wiki this contains time-tested wisdom of the ancients distilled into scrolls.
I found one that hit my very core! A scroll that I’ll bring as I continue my journey… And I want to share it to everyone…
Scroll III : Today I Will Be Master Of My Emotions
And how will I master my emotions so that everyday is a happy day, and a productive one? I will learn this secret of the ages: Weak is he who he permits his thoughts to control his actions; strong is he who forces his actions to control his thoughts. Each day, when I awake, I will follow this plan of battle before I am captured by the forces of sadness, self pity and failure.
Today, I will be the master of my emotions.
Henceforth I will recognize and identify the mystery of moods in all mankind, and in me. From this moment I am prepared to control whatever personality awakes in me each day. I will master my moods through positive action and when I master my moods I will control my destiny.
Today, I control my destiny, and my destiny is to become the greatest salesman in the world.
I will become master of myself.
I will become great.
Episode #320 - Everyday is A Sunday Evening
One Tree Hill - Voiceovers Done By: Nathan
"There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroads. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days."
"Stepping up. It's a simple concept. It basically means to rise above yourself; to do a little more, to show you something special. Something like this. Lucas is gone, but that doesn't mean the season is over. As a matter of fact, I say it's just beginning. You might want to stay out of my way for a while. Life's funny sometimes; can push pretty hard like when you fall in love with someone but they forget to love you back, like when your best friend and your boyfriend leave you alone, like when you pull the trigger or light the flame and you can't take it back. Like I said, in sports they call this 'stepping up'. In life, I call it 'pushing back".'
"You know it's been said that we just don't recognize the significant moments of our lives while they're happening. We grow complacent with ideas, or things or people and we take them for granted and it's usually not until that thing is about to be taken away from you that you've realized how wrong you've been that you realized how much you need it, how much you love it. God, I love this game."
"You ever heard the expression 'The best things in living are free.' Well that expression is true.' Every once in a while, people step up they rise above themselves sometimes they surprise you and sometimes they fall short. Life is funny sometimes. It can push pretty hard but if you look close enough, you can find hope in the words of children, in the bars of the song and in the eyes of someone you love. And if you're lucky, if you're the luckiest person on this entire planet, the person you love decides to love you back."
... that doubt is the greatest gift.
Any change on its way from one place of stability to the next one, passes ...through a period of doubt. Your old perspective has to disintegrate, and doubt comes in for a visit - even if only for a moment, before the new perspective takes root. Doubt is your greatest gift, because from doubt you can go anywhere.
(From Facebook's 'Read Your Message From God')
Parola sa Bagacay Point (Bagacay Point Lighthouse) –
One of the few remaining architectural examples of American colonial architecture, this lighthouse stands at a towering height of 72 feet in an uphill area overlooking the Mactan Channel. This lighthouse was built in 1904 by an executive order by Governor-General William Howard Taft.
The lighthouse has become a favorite playground of photo enthusiasts, subject of Cebuano painters and like the history of this guiding light, this structure has been a favorite backdrop of lovers who are about to tie the knot.
NOW LOOK FOR THE LIGHTHOUSE...
Photo taken by Vicky Montilla-Nepomuceno
T’WAS DEADLY BEAUTIFUL PATTAYA
T’was in November of 2008 when three of my bestfriends Kay, Shelene and Brian went to Thailand to celebrate Kay’s birthday, to think years ago we are just fine celebrating birthdays with just a cake and few candles…
T’was after braving the famous yet confusing Chatuchak and Suan Lum markets in Bangkok, a bumpy ride with a Thai Dumbo at Samphran and a night with a belly full of Tiger beer at Route 66 that made us think our vacation needs an R&R. Yup! You’re reading it right a vacation consumed by consumerism needs rest and relaxation.
T’was not the excitement that we’re going to a not-so remote Coral Island that almost killed me but the nerve-wracking speedboat ‘whirligig.’ During that thirty-minute plus trip I was already recording a scene of me going back to the Philly inside a cadaver bag. All I can remember that time is that my eyeballs we’re literally rolling not only because of fear, but because I’m already frantically searching for an orange jacket… a life-saving vest!
T’was seconds after setting my feet on the sugary sands of the island which made me realize that a trip to a paradise of bliss can never be smooth sailing. Like, the most pleasurable experiences in life are best felt after trials and tribulations. True indeed that, “it is pleasurable, when winds disturb the waves of a great sea…” Lucretius said that!
T’was this experience which made me think (minutes ago) that – I may be wallowing on the kind of stress that I’m journeying right now. But, at the end of this septic tunnel is a white island plucked out from Maldives! Yes! We are always on the anvil; life at any time can become difficult… by trials God is shaping us for higher things... beautiful things...
Life is indeed deadly beautiful.
HOUSEISMS/ HOUSISMS – Dr Gregory House’s Satirical Jabs
Season 1 | Episode 1 (Pilot)
Rebecca Adler: I just want to die with a little dignity.
Dr. House: There's no such thing! Our bodies break down, sometimes when we're 90, sometimes before we're even born, but it always happens and there's never any dignity in it. I don't care if you can walk, see, wipe your own ass. It's always ugly -- Always! We can live with dignity; we can't die with it.
Season 1 | Episode 2 (Paternity)
Dr. Foreman: He probably just moved. Nobody stays perfectly still for their MRI.
Dr. House: Yeah, he probably got restless and shifted one hemisphere of his brain to a more comfortable position.
Season 1 | Episode 5 (Damned if You Do)
Dr. House: I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone, that someone is probably the last person you should ask.
Season 1 | Episode 6 (The Socratic Method)
Luke: Is this a good hospital?
Dr. House: Depends on what you mean by "good". I like the chairs.
Season 1 | Episode 7 (Fidelity)
House: As long as you're trying to be good, you can do whatever you want.
Dr. Wilson: And as long as you're not trying, you can say whatever you want.
Dr. House: So between us, we can do whatever we want. We can rule the world!
Dr. House: Clinical depression. Incredibly contagious. Every time I get around one of them, I get blue.
Season 1 | Episode 8 (Poison)
Dr. Foreman: The kid was just taking his AP calculus exam when all of a sudden he got nauseous and disoriented.
Dr. House: That's the way calculus presents.
Dr. House: I'm sorry - the fact that the sexual pleasure center of your cerebral cortex has been overstimulated by spirochetes is a poor basis for a relationship. I learned that one the hard way.
Season 1 | Episode 11 (Detox)
Dr. House: I take risks - sometimes patients die. But not taking risks causes more patients to die. So I guess my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.
I am JadedKnight...
It's been eons since I wanted to start my own space inside the I-way. There's Debbie and Sher who would constantly ask me when I'll start my piece in the web; Jona and Dhon who would push me to give blogging a shot (to release stress); and Markee our homegrown blogspot guru who would just give me that "don't-be-a-dummy-Clarence-stare" every time I barge at his station and do my FAQ'ish exploits. Markee's resignation would always be just click here, then here and there!
With Posh and Becks on my boobie, a crawling Internet connection, a very hungry belly... and pulsating heartbeat (blame it to the boozzie earlier)... I was able to gather enough force and fervor from literary land to draft my first entry... KAZOOOM to moi.'
So that my spot wouldn't be as dubious as the ones used by extremists and leftists, because of the word 'jadedknight.' I need to answer the question you have for me. Why JadedKnight?
As a pupil of experience, people sometimes see me as jaded because of my cynical views on love, and love only. Outlook brought on by the idea that this path that I took would never give me a Grimm'esque tale on love. But really, behind the jaded armor that I fashionably wear, I'm a knight. A knight who craves for the so called "moments," that sword slashing nirvana where everything seems to move faster than carriage pulled by a batallion of white Thoroughbreds. Like a knight who is a staunch defender of his king, I am a protector of my life's king... my heart. Earnestly, at this very instant, and I would utter it only here, I'm a knight ready to hand down my lance of haughtiness, my sword of fretfulness and my shiny shield of vainglory for that requited ardent feeling to be emotionally attached.
I am a JadedKnight because behind that strapping cynicism on my definition of love I am deeply fascinated by simple yet beautiful love stories (and cry also). By now you would be thinking that I'm such a crackhead because I can't seem to get a purer definition on loving and romanticism. Maybe, this is for seeing the bigger picture of being attached and... thinking the kind of pain that you have to endure after falling out of love. For my endless search (or am I really searching?) for THE ONE and the chivalry on the side, I am already weary, disillusioned, ergo jaded! But like a knight, and my friends would always say - I should need to pursue the search gallantly to conquer my castle with all the charms of good life in it.
So can anyone place their chalice of thoughts on my roundtable? Would love to hear from people who valiantly pursue the king of kings... LOVE.
